Our radical gay family agenda has been quite an adventure the last few days. We have been to Frankfurt, Munich, Venice, Corfu, and Santorini so far. We still have stops in Mykonos and Ephesus before returning to Venice. Our daughter has been immersed in cultures and loves every minute of our gay agenda. We have been teaching her how to say hello and goodbye in each language and have given her a purse full of euros to buy her own little souvenirs. She is quite stylish walking around with her little patchwork purse we bought in Corfu, Greece. She speaks to everyone who passes her by. When she hears someone speak a foreign language, she usually says, “hola”. I guess she thinks that if people are not speaking English they MUST speak Spanish. I think she may be watching too much Dora the Explorer. All of the stewards on the ship have fallen in love with her and usually say hola to her before she can get the word out to greet them.
We are quite surprised that our daughter has adjusted so well to the lengthy travel and time change. She has not missed a beat. She cannot wait to get up each morning and see what is on our radical gay agenda for the day. She gets a healthy dose of exhaustion and has been sleeping well each night. We have also found a special treat for both she and the adults of the family. Each night she begs to go to the kid’s camp on the ship. We feed her dinner, drop her off at the camp and enjoy a nice meal with uninterrupted adult conversation at the nicer restaurants. It’s a win-win for everyone.
Our radical gay family agenda today consisted of a stop in Santorini, Greece. Santorini is one of the most magical places we have ever been. Since we are so radical, we chose to ride donkeys up the mountain to the hilltop city. I found out the hard way I am allergic to ass. I know that may shock many who read this post. I will never climb onto another donkey while wearing shorts! The entire family had a blast on our 4-legged helper’s backs until half way to the top. The donkeys kept running into each other. Gregory’s knee was slammed into one of the donkey’s behinds. Our daughter kept laughing and shouting, “Gregory has donkey poop on his knee…that’s disgusting!” The fun times also halted when we got off the donkeys and realized we all had donkey poop and/or leather saddle stains on the back of our shorts. My mom was horrified by the brown smear on the seat of her white capri pants and was announcing to everyone at the top of the hill that it was from riding the donkey and that she would happily pay anyone $20 for a clean pair of shorts. We bought mom a scarf and wrapped it around her waist to ease her mind. Gregory and I ducked into the nearest men’s shop and bought a new pair of European shorts to change into. All was right with the world as we continued our shopping spree and had lunch overlooking the ocean.
We have come into contact with too many families to mention. I see constant lines of people at the customer service counter at mid-ship, Deck 7. I know they must be couples requesting separate cabins because of the destruction of their marriages. There is no way people are able to escape our wrath in such a concentrated space. How do you say radical gay agenda in Greek? We terrorize Mykonos tomorrow.