Category Archives: Religion

Kindergarten is SO last year!

The daily routine of packing PB&J sandwiches into my daughter’s Wizard of Oz lunchbox has come to an end until after summer. She just graduated kindergarten! Her daddies are so proud of her accomplishments. We sat in the audience sobbing as she accepted her diploma and exclaimed that math was her favorite subject this year. There must be some radical gay agenda behind her liking math. I mean, “normal” children like PE or art. Where did we go wrong?

Proud Daddies!

Just before graduation, we took a trip to Washington DC for family lobby day with Family Equality Council. We were featured on CNN. Our daughter was instrumental in gaining the attention of staffers while walking the halls of Congress. She drew a picture of her family that she shared at each meeting. It was one of the most beautiful stick figure drawings I have ever seen. She neatly labeled “Dad” over the stick figure with the gray hair, “Daddy” over the stick figure with the blonde swoop hair, and “Carrigan” over the adorable stick girl with the pig-tail braids. It was amazing to see her point out each member of her family to staff members in DC. It is such a radical gay agenda to show a happy, healthy family through the eyes of a child. We were so proud of her for just being a kid and for not having an embarrassing meltdown. We pretended the halls were underground tunnels in Hogwart’s. She love Harry Potter, so we were all set!
As we prepare for a full summer of travel and educational school camps, we ponder how much we have done to destroy the sanctity of marriage over the past year….and for some reason my mind is drawing a blank. We have participated in a few weddings but can not think of a single divorce we caused. I’m sure there is a couple out there somewhere that we ripped apart with our carpool queue, dance recitals, poolside picnics, and bicycle training. I will keep you posted as the destruction is unveiled.

Below is a link to the CNN feature story of our Washington, DC lobby day efforts with Family Equality Council.

http://www.cnn.com/2012/05/17/politics/lgbt-families-congress/index.html

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Radical Gay Family Beats Us To Italy

It looks like another radical gay family has started the destruction of the sanctity of marriage in Italy. And, they started with the Pope. I am so disappointed we were not the ones to reach him first.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/vatican-reverses-stance-on-gay-marriage-after-meet,20912/

What a fun laugh! We love the sarcasm and false stories of The Onion. We have much in common.

Radical Gay Family Agenda 7/11/11

In order for people to make educated conclusions, they must be exposed to all sides of the equation. It is important that people separate fact from opinion. People can make up opinions but they can not make up facts.

Here are a ten facts that people CAN NOT change no matter how hard they try:

FACTS

1 – I am a father.

2 – I have a daughter.

3 – I am legally married to Jeff in the state of California. (Today is our 3rd wedding anniversary by the way.)

4 – Jeff and I have been in a committed relationship since 1996.

5 – I am human.

6 – My daughter is loved.

7 – My daughter is healthy.

8 – I have a family.

9 – I was born gay.

10 – I pay taxes.

Here are ten opinions (delusions) of people that CAN be changed:

OPINIONS

1 – Marriage is solely for procreation.

2 – People choose to be gay.

3 – God Hates Fags.

4 – The Bible says it is wrong to be gay.

5 – LGBT people can not raise healthy children.

6 – Marriage equality will destroy the sanctity of marriage.

7 – Marriage equality will destroy society.

8 – Men are not capable of taking care of a baby.

9 – Children need a mother and a father.

10 – There is a radical gay agenda.

Today I challenge people to separate their opinions from fact. I am still looking for proof that my family has caused harm to anyone in the world by living our lives. I am proud of our radical gay family agenda and am very proud of my family.

Now, on a more serious note….

We are getting ready to leave for our European family vacation. My daughter keeps telling everyone we are going to Italy, Grease, and Chicken even though we are actually going to Italy, Greece, and Turkey. I love her interpretation of reality. We hope to spread our radical gay agenda far and wide as we set sail to explore foreign lands. Keep us in your thoughts as you watch the increase of the international divorce rate. We know our radical gay family agenda of exploring ancient cities, riding donkeys, splashing in the pool on deck 12, enjoying native foods, learning different cultures, and spending time together will be the cause of foreign family destruction. When you see the fighting in Greece, know we are probably the cause.

I look forward to updating everyone on our progress but will be sparse in my blog posts over the next couple weeks. Everyone stay radical!

Great interview by Kyra Phillips

http://cnn.com/video/?/video/bestoftv/2011/06/17/exp.nr.tyree.same.sex.marriage.cnn

I applaud Kyra for stating the FACTS and asking the right questions.

Radical Gay Family Agenda 6/18/11

It is a nice, quiet Saturday morning at the Starling-Littlefield home. Mi Hao Kai Lan is yapping on the television and we have already watched George of the Jungle 2. The first version with Brendan Fraser was much more appealing. Jeff just went to get his hair cut and we are awaiting his return so we can spend some family time by the pool today. Our daughter is searching the house for her Dora goggles and has already picked out her Hello Kitty bikini for the day’s festivities. I hope she finds the goggles soon or we may have a serious meltdown.

Our radical gay family agenda for the day is all about family time and relaxation. It must seem foreign for most people to consider frolicking by the pool with their child for an afternoon. I know it is extremely radical and gay for us to swim, float, and enjoy the sun. I’m positive our activities today are sure to sabotage several marriages in Iowa or Illinois.

Jeff and I have a wedding to attend this afternoon. This poor, young couple has no idea how easily our attendance could obliterate their marriage. They could be doomed from the start by inviting us to witness their union. How can our close friends not know how our radical gay agenda will affect them? Their family must have felt some discomfort over the last fifteen years of knowing us. How have they escaped our destruction for so long. We have known the bride since she was a child. It baffles me how she even has the guts to walk down the aisle knowing we will be there. Maybe they will escape our wrath and have a long and happy marriage like us. We will withhold thrusting our agenda upon them to wish them much happiness and love.

The happy couple will be excluded from our radical gay agenda for the day but we have many wedding guests to inflict our harm upon. As we sip champagne and toast the lucky couple, we will willfully cast our spell upon the wedding guests and expect to see divorce decrees in the near future. I wonder if any of these unsuspecting people will have any idea that “the only gays in the village” will be the cause of their demise. We will remain under the radar so our agenda is not foiled. We have to stay radical in order to prove those crazy politicians and religious leaders correct. What kind of platform would these people have if they were resolute in the fact that we were just like them? Now that, my friends, would be radical and GAY!

Radical Gay Family Agenda 5/31/11

It has been a busy day, hence the late, short blog entry! My daughter and I had to take my mom to a doctor’s appointment this morning. Thank goodness I have great friends that are doctors; I was able to get my mom taken care of quickly. It is nothing major, so no worries. She is just getting old. (Love you mom) We were able to squeeze in hair cuts before I had to leave to go out-of-town two hours away for a business meeting. My mom and daughter enjoyed the sun and pool today while I was gone. I wish I had a chance to do that, I am in desperate need of a tan.

I am trying to put together a week’s worth of outfits, snacks, and lunch packs for my daughter so my mom will have minimal work to do while we are away. I find it easier to lay everything out and make lists and notes. Maybe it is just my control freak OCD nature? My husband would make that argument. I’m sure they will be fine and have a good time while we are away.

We get to spread some of our radical gay agenda to the great folks in New Orleans the rest of the week. I wonder if the people in the French Quarter have any idea that there are gays across the lavender line on Bourbon Street. I bet they will after this weekend. Never mind the strip clubs, numerous bars, summer-breakers, jealous girlfriends, and testosterone, it will be us gays that wreck the marriages of the classy folks partying in NOLA this week. I hope we are able to knock out at least a few!

I will be spending the night packing as soon as we eat dinner, bathe my daughter, and tuck her into bed. I will miss my little dumpling this weekend and look forward to hearing all her stories of adventures with grandma.

 

Radical Gay Family Agenda 5/25/11

Last night I had a very spiritual experience. Yes folks, as they say in The Color Purple, “sinners have soul too”. We were fortunate enough to enjoy some gospel music in the chapel at Palmetto Bluffs. What an amazing experience to sit on a church pew with a glass of wine and listen to some amazing singers who call themselves The Voices of Shaddai. I was truly moved to tears by their voices. Sitting on that chapel pew last night I realized how much I missed church. Don’t get me wrong, I despise most religion and what the religious extremists are doing to tear our world apart, but I miss the church I knew as a child. I miss the wonderful music, sense of community, and caring people. I do not miss the preaching and judgement and installation of fear and hate. It struck me last night that these beautiful people were sharing a special moment with me that I would treasure sharing again, however, I would probably not be welcome in their church because I am gay. I saddens me to know that I can no longer enjoy the experience of the church I so enjoyed in my youth. At least I had my moment last night. Those women raised the roof off that chapel….Hallelujah! Praise Jesus! (hands in the air, feet stomping, joy)

Today we return home from a nice little get-away. I can’t wait to see my little angel and get my hugs and kisses. I understand she was attacked by a swarm of mosquitoes yesterday at school, so I have lots of boo boos to kiss. We will have to stop at the store on the way home and pick up some new Hello Kitty Band-Aids to cover those boo boos and prevent her from scratching. Mosquitoes, the one major downfall of living in the South.

I have lots of work to catch up on, as does Jeff. We will be back to reality tomorrow. With my new-found spirituality, I think I may have some new plans for destroying the sanctity of marriage. I’m going to raise my hands, raise my voice, and magically rip those marriages apart. Can I get an Amen?