My book, Bob The Ladybug: Bob’s New Pants is now available on Amazon and at http://www.bobtheladybug.com.
We have all heard the term “nesting” to describe the process of preparing your home for the arrival of a new child, but what exactly does it mean to nest? Well, if you are part of the Radical Gay Family Agenda, nesting is the transformation of a bland space into something fabulous in order to put straight moms to shame. It would be inappropriate for us radicals to allow our sweet babies to sleep in a room that is not decked out with designer touches.
For the impending arrival of our little boy, we decided that baby blue was just not good enough for a family that is steeped in the ability to ruin American values. Our little man will be spending his infant years staring at hues of tangerine, chocolate and vanilla. No, not orange, brown, and off-white…that just sounds too straight! We have high standards to uphold. Our journey to destroy tradition would never be successful with such trite and obvious colors. Our son will spend his waking moments in his crib under our eccentric version of a mobile; a natural corkscrew willow limb adorned with carefully handmade tangerine leaves. Store-bought plastic mobiles would be out of place in this David Bromstad inspired space.
To round off the nursery that straight moms will envy are cute little hand-cut birds fluttering about the walls and a large oriental rug with colors to match. A chocolate brown suede glider rocker has been added for the dads’ comfort on those late night feedings. Custom bedding finishes off the crib and the changing table is adorned with matching changing pad covers. The window is draped with flowing curtains containing twig and bird patterns to match the bedding. The nursery is complete and ready for baby.
So, is our nesting complete? Not really. All the nursery décor and design has been fun and exciting but really has nothing to do with the real sense of nesting. As far as I am concerned, nesting is a state of mind, not a state of design. I joke about putting the nursery together to make straight moms jealous but the truth is we dads have similar preparation feelings. We strive to make sure our baby has all the necessities needed to be happy and healthy. We also worry about doing everything possible to make sure our children are showered with love. Babies don’t care about the looks of their surroundings; they care about being loved, fed, and cared for. With this being our second child, we are confident we can provide everything needed for our little guy to thrive.
So, as we start the process of washing all the cute little onesies in fragrance-free non-allergenic detergent and we painstakingly clean and sanitize the Tommee Tippee bottles, we will have endearing thoughts of our little boy. Those thoughts are filled with the delight of adding to our loving family as we continue the “nesting” process.